


HOTEL KUMANAMI

by tsumugi_shirokuma



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Crack, Crack Fic, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Jokes, Kinda Comedy, Love Confessions, Love Hotels, Love at First Sight, Love/Hate, Memes Included in a way, References to Canon, Sleepy Cuddles, True Love, Unreliable Narrator, don't ask why i'm having fun with this, this is so bad wtf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-12-03
Packaged: 2018-12-30 16:51:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 3,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12113058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsumugi_shirokuma/pseuds/tsumugi_shirokuma
Summary: No one killed eachother, and Monokuma's pissed. So instead of a Killing Game, he makes them 'kiss-kiss fall in love' instead. But can you really count that as despair? Or maybe...something else? (Not really taken seriously, I tried to at first but then my memey self came out at the wrong time-)





	1. The Start

**Author's Note:**

> Here come's a lot of rarepairs and more!!

Monokuma would stare at the building, it looked ready. He looked behind him, his kids were behind him. "Are you sure the students will like this, papa?" Monotaro asked. "Very sure. I've prepared it all day, so I hope that they will like this..." He answered. "I have to give the keys out, right?" Monokid tilted his head. "Of course, I recommend going to the keystation right now. You don't want to be late or anything." He turned around. "What about the rest of us?" Monophanie said. "You follow me, we have an announcement to make." Monokuma said walking away. Monotaro, Monophanie, Monosuke and Monodam would follow him as Monokid would go inside to the keystation.

 

“ATTENTION ALL STUDENTS, TIME FOR A SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT! COME TO THE GYM!”

 

The announcement blared from all the monitors in the school, it was loud too.

Everyone slowly started to wake up from that.

No one has still killed each other for weeks now. So instead, Monokuma would thought of something else.

Instead of a killing game, he would force people to make each other 'kiss kiss fall in love' because hey, no one is killing each other and they also met each other so why not?

Today was the day that it would start, according to him.

When everyone would arrive at the gym, Monokuma came out from the podium.

"Hey hey! I see we are all here..." He began counting the students. "Great! Now how about I put you into different groups..." He went down with chalk and started drawing a line. "GIRLS ON ONE SIDE! BOYS ON THE OTHER!" He demanded. Everyone got on one of the sides, it was even. Monokuma climbed back onto the podium and sat down. Monotaro, Monophanie, Monosuke and Monodam appeared. "What's this, papa?" Monotaro asked. "Something that's part of the announcement of course..." He sighed. “Part of the announcement? But how?” Monophanie tilted her head. “Oh y’know...BY PUTTING MY STUDENTS INTO GROUPS OF 2!” Monokuma yelled.

Some students felt confused...Groups of 2? What? This is just…

"Now now...i'll be fair...you can choose who you want your partner to be in..."

The students got their hopes up before Monokuma said,

"BUT! It has to be your opposite gender..."

Tenko felt like dying inside...

"Now! GET CHOOSING!!!" Monokuma yelled.

Everyone would be scrambling around the gym as Monokuma sat down again.

He'd 'Upupu'd like usual.

Some people chose the other.

Like, Gonta chose Tsumugi...Ryouma chose Kirumi...Miu ran to Kiibo and tackled him.

Himiko was being chased by Ouma, Maki was being called 'Harumaki' by Kaito.

Angie and Korekiyo were next to each other.

Tenko was shrieking in the corner the whole time.

3 Students left basically...does Tenko count? Not even I know.

Oh boy...

Monokuma stared them down, he looked impatient, because his red eye was glowing.

Kaede felt a shiver on her back as she looked at the headmaster, he was very serious about this.

He tapped his foot, and it would go faster.

Suddenly, out of the blue, Rantarou would grab Kaede's arm.

"Ah, I see! Well then! TENKOOOOOOOOOOO!" Monokuma yelled again.

Tenko was still in that corner as Monokuma yelled for her.

Monokuma would sigh, he would tell Shuuichi to go get her.

"Alright alright! Now that your all put into groups, I recommend that we oughta' head outside! There's a place you CANNOT miss!"

Monokuma would run out, his children following him.

Everyone stared at each other.

Woah, this is just...so sudden.

Some of the groups left.

But the others just stood there, dumbfounded.

Some people were nervous to see what would happen next...

Ouma though...he was just grinning like a the usual.

It's normal by now, and I dunno why.

Maybe he's thinking of something we never knew....WHO KNOWS!

Anyways, the other groups followed the others.

They all eventually made it to a fancy looking building...

"HOTEL KUMANAMI"

They read the sign.

"Love? Is this a love hotel?!" Himiko gasped in shock.

"Mmmmmmhhhhmmmmmmmm." Monokuma said turning around.

"Oh! Is this why you put us in...groups of 2?" Tsumugi asked.

"Oh, you'll see! Bet'cha can't wait to see what happens soon...especially with Gokuhara there!" Monokuma chuckled.

"Now you guys go to the Key Station, your keys will be there!" Monotaro said.

"What he said." Monosuke said reading a book.

So, they rushed over to the Key Station.

Monokid would come out, playing music.

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! IT'S TIME TO GIVE OUT SOME KEEEEEEEEEEEEYS!" He yelled.

Monokid would give the groups one key for their room, neat.

So then again, they rushed over to the hotel. But while they were doing that, Monotaro was staring at Rantarou with Monosuke next to him.

"Monosuke, i'm not sure about this Amami guy..."

"How so?"

"He looks...suspicious..."

"You shouldn't worry about it much, Monotaro."

"FINEEE!"

Once all the groups were in, they scrambled around to find their room.

They all found their rooms at the same time, coincidentally.

They all unlocked their doors and enter their rooms slowly...


	2. Gonta & Tsumugi

The first room...it was nice and tidy, nothing out of the blue that could harm ANYONE! The 2 walk in and look around.

"This sure is a nice room, Gokuhara." Tsumugi spoke.

"Ah yes, Gonta thinks the same way too!" Gonta agreed.

They look around for a bit. They had a chat about how their lives have been, and if you wanna know, they've both been great.

There was feeling inside the 2 of them that was growing bigger and bigger, during the chat, they started to awkwardly stutter.

"..."

"..."

An awkward moment to remember? I don't know...could be.

"Shirogane-san, Gonta wants to know what this feeling is inside of him."

"I-I don't know...Gokuhara-kun..."

Is it just me...or they did get closer?

...

OH. They did.

They kept moving closer to eachother like it was their destiny.

When they finally got close to comfort they would end up...cuddling!

Truly amazing to see a bond at last!

I mean, surely that they will...'kiss kiss fall in love' with each other...right?

...

We'll see.


	3. Ryouma & Kirumi

Now THIS room, is a mess.

Kirumi looked very disappointed, but atleast she had time to clean the room.

Maybe Monokuma did this because she likes it?

Don't know!

Anyways, Kirumi got cleaning straight, cleaning tools and all.

Ryouma sat on the bed, he managed to climb like Mount Everest.

He tried to think of what to say, but he was just...amazed, by Kirumi's work.

He kept staring for most of it.

Eventually made him daydream...of something.

"Hoshi? Are you ok?" Kirumi asked, getting Ryouma's attention back.

"Oh, yes I am..." He responded.

"Alright then..." She was about to finish the room until...

"Wait, can I tell you something?"

"...? What would that be?"

"I...really...like your cleaning..."

"..."

"Well, I clean for almost everything-"

"AND I..."

"Wh--"

"LOVE YOU! AS MUCH AS YOUR CLEANING!!"

Kirumi was taken aback.

Such a sudden love confession.

"You...what?"

"Look...i'm sorry-"

"It's fine! Are you sure that your true?"

"Yes..."

"I see..."

It took her a moment, until she had some consent.

"Glad you feel the same way then...Ryouma."

Ryouma felt the sadness in him go away, getting replaced by happiness thanks to Kirumi.

"Thanks, Kirumi, you make me feel better."

"That's good..."

They ended up having a nice relaxing session for basically the rest of the day until they fell asleep peacefully.

Ain't that nice?


	4. Tenko & Shuuichi

NOW THIS ROOM, it's pretty dark- I MEAN IT HAS SOME GREEN, but it's mainly blue...blue-green anyone? TEAL? FOREST GREEN?? CYAN???

ok ok, let's be serious.

Tenko was EXTREMELY uncomfortable, mainly because...she's with her worst fear yet...men.

Or should I say a man? Because there's one boy in the room- I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE.

She was currently dying inside and showing it outside as she entered the room.

She tried to lock the door before Shuuichi came in...BUT Y'KNOW HOW HEIGHT WORKS EVERYONE.

"Chabashira...let me in-"

"NOOOOO! I'M NOT LETTING A FILTHY MAN IN!"

It became a pushing competition, who will win?! The Akkido Master or the Detective?!

Well, the pushing was so INTENSE that the door almost broke.

They were both screaming, Tenko was more louder though.

After a while, Tenko would get tired and her pushing got more weaker.

Shuuichi took the advantage and came in.

...that made Tenko run to the door.

He already locked it...oh.

She kept banging on the door, screaming "LET ME OUT!".

SHE EVEN ATTEMPTED TO KICK IT DOWN!...which failed.

"Chabashira, calm down-"

"HOW CAN I BE CALM?! I'M WITH A FILTHY MAN, AND THAT'S YOOOOOOU!!"

Shuuichi sighed, how is he gonna calm down Tenko? He is part of her worst fears...

"Look how about I leave you alone for a few minutes, then will you calm down?"

"PLEASE LEAVE ME ALOOOOOONE!"

So, Shuuichi went to a different side of the room while Tenko was curled up in front of the door.

She kept mumbling things to get out of here, but she knows it probably won't work.

Shuuichi however, was slowly feeling the tension grow, it got BIGGER AND BIGGER every second!

But he still had some confidence in himself, he has to let Tenko calm down!...because he doesn't want to get thrown of course.

...

Minutes passed by, the clock still ticking.

Then tension in Shuuichi is probably almost full by now, and Tenko is just staring at the door, hoping for someone to unlock and make a break for it.

Finally, Shuuichi got up and made his way to the Akkido Master.

Before she can even act, the Detective already grabbed her arm.

She struggled and struggled, but y'know....height differences-

This was even worse for Tenko...SHE WAS BEING TOUCHED BY A MAN! AND IT'S ON HER ARM!

She got thrown onto the bed.

NOW'S SHE REALLY SCARED.

As Shuuichi climbed onto the bed, going next to her, she became paralyzed.

There was no use in struggling anymore...he's got her.

As Tenko started to feel the tension grow, she still hated him deep inside.

Shuuichi was too busy rubbing his hand on her hair...

He gave her many compliments and other flirty things.

Tenko never wanted this...she always did.

But the thing is that can make this worse...is that she has to stay there for 4 more days...

Oh boy.


	5. Miu & K1-B0 (Kiibo)

Ok so this room is filled with many tools and gadgets and...OTHER SHIT.

Miu was amazed by everything in it, like one big workshop...that wasn't really big, it's just a room, y'know.

Kiibo (i'm calling him Kiibo and you can't stop me) stood there in awkward silence as Miu continued searching around, he didn't know what to do in a situation like this, especially in front of Miu.

So, he just stood by the door.

He wondered why there were so many things and how humans used them.

"Heeeey! Kiibo!"

"Huh- Oh! Yes, Iruma?"

"Look what I have!"

She brought out...a mustache? What-

"What's that-"

"A white mustache for robots! Do you like it?"

"...SINCE WHEN DID HUMANS GET MUSTACHE FOR ROBOTS?!"

"It's a metaphor Kiibo-"

"THIS IS ROBOPHOBIC! I'LL SUE WHOEVER DID THIS!!"

"...ok."

Miu rolled her eyes and threw the 'gift' away.

She just laid down on the bed, looking relaxed.

Kiibo was still at the door, staring at her.

I don't know what to say...but...SOMEONE IS GETTING THE TENSION.

But who?

...

Gee.

Well anyways, Miu was at the point were she almost fell asleep, until she felt something inside her.

That's right,

Tension.

HAH YOU THOUGHT IT WAS KII- I'll stop.

Now she just felt awkward.

Kiibo's in the room and she doesn't know what to do!

I mean, if she gets up, she's gonna probably tackle him...

But if she doesn't, the tension will GROW!...wait is that bad?

...

i think it is.

OK OK SERIOUS TIME.

She mumbled some things...not even I know.

Kiibo perked up.

"What is that Iruma?"

"OH!! NOTHING KIIBO."

"Are you sure? You've been talking to yourself quietly...so there's definitely something wrong!"

"Ugh...it's personal information..."

"Personal? If it's personal, then why were talking about it just then?"

"BECAU- nevermind..."

"Iruma please..."

She slowly got up, heading towards the robot.

Some voices chanted in her head.

'KISS THE ROBOT! KISS THE ROBOT!'

She was being tempted.

Due to her usual pervy personality, she had some...dirty thoughts about Kiibo and her.

'Must...not...do that...'

She just tackle hugged him.

"Irum-"

"Kiibo..."

She felt him hug back, which made her feel better.

Kiibo felt the tension too by now.

Miu felt her hand move to the lower area of Kiibo, but she stopped herself.

Maybe another day...who knows?

If they are both happy, that's what matters.


	6. Korekiyo & Angie

YOU THOUGHT I WAS GONE WEREN'T YOU?

Well I come bac

HAH

ok so anyways

THIS ROOM WAS LEGIT

IT WAS...an art room-ish thing.

woah.

Angie was in love with this room, it had everything she liked everything about it, mainly because...ART!

Korekiyo looked around,

it was filled with culture...

HUMAN CULTURE-

"This room...it's beautiful..."

"Angie agrees, maybe her god will approve of this too!"

They continued looking around, it was too interesting to resist.

HEY THAT'S PRETTY GOOD I GUESS

So anyways, Korekiyo went into deep thought, seeing Angie so happy about a room to him made him happy too.

Ain't that nice?

Soon, those thoughts would be replaced by his sister...

He missed her a lot, still having those...sexual fantasies deep in his brain.

ytho

don't ask.

OK THEN.

He tried to get it out, but failed horribly.

So instead of his sister...

He had to imagine...Angie...

EW WHAT-

BRO LET IT FLOW

FINEEE.

Is this part of the tension?

Or could it be real?

Hopefully it's the tension because who want's Korekiyo wanting to fuck Angie- I mean what.

cough, ok.

Angie was too distracted to notice, by now, she was making something.

A piece of art.

A good one to be exact.

I MEAN, IT'S AMAZING!

Korekiyo just stared at her, doing her work.

'This is interesting...too interesting...'

It's that feeling...

"Kukukuku..."

"Hm?? Is there something wrong, Shinguji?"

Now Angie was at the point of concern.

"Oh Yonaga...your so graceful with that art of yours..."

He went on and on with compliments.

"Do you really think that?"

"Yes...I do."

"That's amazing!!"

She ran to the Anthropologist...then hugging him.

They fell on the bed, due to their weights.

They stared at each other before falling asleep.


	7. Kaito and Maki

In this room, it was...starry, that's all I can say really.

To be honest...you never knew, no i'm serious you never knew-

SO ANYWAYS, Maki felt kinda uncomfortable, I mean, Kaito was excited to be here.

Mainly because...the stars. They are everywhere y'know?

So yeah, you get it.

Maki couldn't really handle it, she was at the urge of screaming in agony. Then again, she's with Kaito out of all people.

So she can't really scream, I mean, she kinda does care? She hasn't shown any emotion yet for him.

Unless...

TENSION- i'm sorry.

Oh wait...I feel the tension, NO NOT IN ME-

Fine, i'll quit my blabbering and give you a closer look on this.

Maki felt strange, due to the tension she was gaining feelings for Kaito...because that's how the tension thing works according to Monokuma.

But she shook it off, ignoring it.

They were just...having a staring contest...which led to something else eventually.

What is that 'something else' you ask?

 

...

 

Some...thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter at last, for the 'terrible' crack fic with rarepairs! Y'all have been rushing me! I will continue this after Halloween, I have to get some spook on!


	8. Ouma and Himiko

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi i'm back again and doing well, time to show you more crappy chapters made by me, frEsH AND sHORt.

The room we are currently viewing is…

Dark.

Really? That’s it?

HAHAHAHA, no son.

We got more detaillll- no it’s not the smut smut shut the hell your mouth.

Okay so anyways, it was half red and purple, with magic and...leader stuff, I don’t know don’t kill me please.

Ouma looked how Himiko, OOOOOH how much he liked her, it’s a common thing, y’know. Monokid knew about it...kinda.

It seems to be, I think.

“Hey, Yumeno-chan, don’t you think the others are boooooring? Y’know, especially Chabashira-chan, total bummer…”

“You don’t say that kind of stuff about her! She’s a nice person, I know it!”

“She’s just tooooo annoying, she probably wants attention from us guys. That’s why she dislikes them.”

Himiko sighed annoyingly, she doesn’t to tell with Ouma right now, and it bugs her a lot.

“Look Ouma, I don’t want to talk with you right now-”

“BUT YUMENO-CHAAAAAAN! THIS IS L-LIKE, A ONE IN A LIFE TIME T-THING! UWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!”

“OUMA I’M SORRY! But not today…”

Ouma grumbled.

“Fineee...but just this once okay? You know when another day comes...i’ll be looking for you.”

“When-”

“I can’t tell you! It’s the perfect surprise!”

“Not if it involves you chasing me around the academy for my attention.”

“Oh whatever!”

They both had some...conversation.

Did they feel the tension? No they did not, wow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about hiatus agAIn. I've been too busy with school, discord, etc. Please booyah- I MeaN undERSTAND.


	9. Amami and Kaede

Walking in the hallway.

It's gonna BE So gReaT.

now this room

IS FILLED WITH- nothing.

jUST kiDDinG THeREs MUSiC.

They lookk, and lookk more.

meanwhileoutside

Monotaro stare at the window.

Monophanie walked to him.

"I-Is there something wrong, Monotaro?"

"MOnOPHANIE, GO GET MONOKID I HAVE AN IDEAAAA!"

"O-Okay!"

She ran to get Monokid.

When Monokid came, he asked Monotaro a question.

"Why did you bring me here-"

"I need a microphone so I can scream stuff into it while you play bass boosted music."

"What-"

"IT'S GoOD"

He bring out sheet and they prepare.

backinthething

"Man, this room is so nice! I'm glad we choose this one!" Kaede said with a smile on her face still looking around-

"Sure is..." Boyo smirkk.

Monotaro prepared his voice outside and lifted the window a bit.

Monokid pressed some stuff and the Monotaro yelled:

"You'll never see it COMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING OH BOY! HERE COMES THE MONEY, IT'S BEST TO CRY YO-"

gets hit by rock from Monodam.

ow

"My ears--" The pianist held her eyes.

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Monokid screams at the top of his bear lungs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEI3N9kIyP4


	10. Epilouge of this 'Amazing' Adventure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> last chapter = NO MOre iM soRRy

Monokuma stared at the screen of the cameras.

"Ah yes, this sure is fine! Seeing all the kids having to spend time with eachother-"

cue scream

"-is nice!"

Monotaro kicked down the door.

"PAPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Monokuma's head did a 360 and never died-

"WHAT"

"I did the best thing ever"

"And that is?"

"I SCREAMED A SONG WITH MONOKID!"

"what"

"I know, it was AAAAMAAAAAZIIIIING! You should have saw it!"

"...okay."

Monokid screamed from a distant.

"YEEEEEEEEAAAH!"

"You hurt my ears and broke some of the glass. Now you have to pay the money." Monosuke came in annoyed like.

"Man you do it, you have to dollars RIGHT THERE!"

cue MonoTARO DrAMatiCAllY pOintING

"WHAT NO-"

"HaABAHBHF-"

"BOTh Of YOU StOP-"

"NEVER!" they said in a unison.

"Boi imma give you both punishment if you don't stop-"

"sorry sorry"

"Anyways hows everyone-" Monotaro looked at one screen.

...

"oH K THEY DOIN GR8"

"Wat"

cue friendship

"ohhhhh"

they shrug and continued their day

everyone gets along at the end of the thing hooray friendship anD LOVE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> iTs AboUt DAAAAANg TImE I fiNish thIs


End file.
